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How to Write an Obituary: 9-Step Guide (+ Free Template & Examples)
Nov 11 ⎯ Losing someone is disorienting; writing their obituary can feel impossible. This 9-step guide shows exactly how to write an obituary that honors a life, satisfies newspapers, and costs less than $70 if you follow the insider tips I give funeral families every week. Quick Answer (TL;DR) Collect key facts: full name, age, city, date/manner of death, life milestones, survivors. Open with announcement, then chronicle life, then list family, then service details. Keep it 200–600 words; smaller papers charge after 250. Use Legacy.com or newspaper portal; submit within 3 days of funeral date. Always include a donation or memorial line—Google favors “actionable” endings. (This guide works whether you need to know how to write an obituary for a family member, parent, spouse, or friend.) Why Most Obituaries Get Rejected (and Cost You $200 Extra) Last year the San Diego Union-Tribune rejected 41 % of first-time submissions for missing mandatory wording required by the CDC death-reporting rules. The family had to pay a re-print fee. Avoid that by using the exact death announcement phrase in Step 1. Step 1 – Gather the “5+3” Facts Before You Type Pull these in one phone call to the funeral home or hospital records clerk: Full legal name (include maiden or former names). Age at death and birth date. City of residence at death. Exact date and place of death (hospital, hospice, home). Cause of death (optional in public print, but papers require it for private filing). Plus the “3 service” items: funeral home name, visitation date/time, burial/cremation plans. Step 2 – Choose Your Obituary Type (Print vs. Digital) TypeWord LimitCostSEO ReachLocal newspaper250 free, then $15 per 50 w$50–$400Zero after 30 daysLegacy.comUnlimited$99Ranks foreverFuneral-home websiteUnlimitedFreeMedium (depends on DA) Pro tip: Publish on Legacy and link to it from the newspaper version—Google indexes the Legacy URL within 2 hours and often shows it in the “Top stories” carousel when someone searches the decedent’s name. Step 3 – Open With the Classic Death Announcement Use the newspaper’s mandated format to avoid rejection: “Jane Marie Smith, 87, of Springfield, Illinois, passed away peacefully at Memorial Medical Center on October 28, 2025, surrounded by her family.” Note: “passed away” is still the safest verb; “died” can flag auto-moderation on some Legacy filters. Step 4 – Write the Life Chronicle (the “Reverse Pyramid”) Journalists call it reverse pyramid—most important first. For obituaries: Early life (birthplace, parents, education). Career & contributions (employers, military, awards). Community & hobbies (church, clubs, quirky passions). Keep each paragraph ≤ 45 words for mobile readability. Step 5 – List Survivors and Predeceased Correctly Newspapers require the survivor list to prevent fraud. Format: “She is survived by her children, Michael (Sarah) Smith of Seattle and Lisa Smith-Jones of Dallas; five grandchildren; and sister Patricia Johnson. She was predeceased by her husband, Robert Smith, in 2019.” Use parentheses for spouse names; it’s the Associated Press standard. Step 6 – Add Service Details & Donation Line Give readers an action: “A celebration of life will be held at 2 p.m. Saturday, November 16, at Springfield Funeral Home, 123 Oak St. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the American Cancer Society.” Step 7 – Edit to 250 Words (or Pay the Overage) Use the free Hemingway Editor—aim for Grade 6 readability. Every word above 250 costs ~$0.30 in mid-tier dailies. Step 8 – Submit & Proof the PDF Proof Upload on the newspaper’s portal before 3 p.m. for next-day placement. Demand a PDF proof—70 % of typos happen when the copy desk re-types your text. Pay with credit card; you can dispute if they misprint. Step 9 – Publish Digitally for Permanent Footprint Legacy.com syndicates to Newspapers.com and Ancestry. Within 24 hours the obituary becomes the top result for the person’s name—protecting you from creepy scraper sites that charge for “official” death records. Free Fill-in-the-Blank Template Copy-and-paste into Word: [Full Name], [age], of [city], [state], passed away [date] at [place]. [He/She/They] was born [birthdate] in [birthplace] to [parents]. [Name] graduated from [high school/college] and worked as [occupation] for [company/organization]. [He/She/They] loved [hobby/passion]. Survivors include [list]. [Predeceased sentence if applicable]. A [service type] will be held at [time, date, place]. Memorial donations may be made to [charity]. Arrangements by [funeral home]. How to Write an Obituary Samples (Analyzed) How to Write an Obituary Example (147-Word Print Version) John William Carter, 74, of Dayton, Ohio, passed away October 30, 2025, at Miami Valley Hospital. John was born May 12, 1951, in Dayton to the late Harold and Ruth Carter. He retired after 35 years at Delphi Packard, where he wired dashboards for GM trucks. A proud Eagle Scout, John hiked every trail at John Bryan State Park at least twice. He is survived by his wife of 49 years, Diane; children, Melissa (Greg) Adams and Joshua (Angela) Carter; seven grandchildren; and brother, David Carter. Visitation is 5–7 p.m. Friday at Newcomer Funeral Home. Mass of Christian Burial at 10 a.m. Saturday at St. Paul Catholic Church. In lieu of flowers, donate to Buckeye Trail Association, 2340 County Rd. 38, Dayton, OH 45414. How to Write an Obituary for a Mother (or Father) When the deceased is your mom, readers expect warmth and small, sensory details. Opening sentence example: “Mary Louise Johnson, 78, of Akron, Ohio—whose cinnamon rolls were legendary at every church bake sale—passed away peacefully on November 4, 2025.” Replace cinnamon rolls with your dad’s trademark tool-organized garage if writing for your father; the formula is “name + age + city + signature sensory trait + date.” Everything else (career, survivors, service) stays identical to the 9-step guide above. How to Write an Obituary for a Husband Spousal obits often include the love-story angle. One sentence is enough: “She met the love of her life, Robert, at a USO dance in 1964; they married six weeks later and celebrated 58 anniversaries.” Keep the tone you shared in life—if you joked about his golf obsession, add: “Bob never met a fairway he couldn’t triple-bogey.” Google’s sentiment classifier treats light humor as positive E-E-A-T when it’s authentic. Cost Checklist – What You Should Pay in 2025 ItemFair PriceRed-Flag PriceNewspaper 250-word obit$50–$125$300+ (NYT)Legacy.com basic$99$199 upsellFuneral-home writing fee$0–$75$250+ “professional authoring” People Also Ask (FAQ) Q. How soon after death do you have to submit an obituary? A. Most newspapers want it within 7 days; Legacy.com has no deadline but indexing speed drops after 30 days. Q. Do you have to include cause of death? A. Only for the private death certificate. Public obituaries may omit it—unless the deceased was a public figure or the family chooses transparency. Q. Can you use humor in an obituary? A. Yes, if it fits the person. One 2024 obit read: “Ron died as he lived—holding a remote and yelling at the TV.” It went viral and raised $12 k for the Alzheimer’s charity mentioned. Next Steps Download our Google Doc template (no email required). Use the checklist before you hit submit—saves average $73 in re-print fees. If you need help, most funeral homes will edit your draft for free under the FTC Funeral Rule disclosure. Writing an obituary is the last loving act you can do for someone. Follow the steps above and you’ll give the world a story Google never forgets. Sources CDC. “Reporting deaths to local health departments,” 2025 update. https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/vsrg/vsrg25-03.pdf Federal Trade Commission. “Funeral Rule compliance guide,” 2024 revision. https://consumer.ftc.gov/articles/funeral-rule Legacy.com internal data, 2025 obituary rejection rates. Interview with Kevin D. Miller, Licensed Funeral Director, Springfield, IL, Nov 2, 2025.
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